“The shrimps”

I swear this is not about food!

It is not, although you my friends know how much I like cooking and experimenting with international cuisine. And seafood Oh Lord! If there’s something to eat in heaven certainly that is seafood! Wait, let me grab a snack and continue.

That’s it. Back to the point.

No my dears, today’s story is about how I did start practicing moderation and smart answering to those not very nice patients; and I did learned it from an awesome nurse.

Nurses are the soul of any health institution; if they are good everything will flow perfectly. Some centers have nurses like the sun, the moon, the stars that save the day in an amazing way when there is a doctor like, well, you know those chinese battery candles for 1 dollar the bulk? Not saying professionally, I’m talking more in their human aspect, which is very important in the primary care level. You can have a grumpy “Doctor House” in a hospital where the pure diagnosis matters more, but for a Family Physician dealing even with personal things of our patients, that’s not a nice attitude!

I take one more minute for paying my tribute to all nurses I have had the privilege to work with, and all their colleagues around the globe that make our life easy at work (I mean if we are good to them, on the contrary we could be screwed, but that’s another topic).

The ”shrimps thing” started with that case of child abuse we were dealing with, not being able to find a solution or to get the witnesses or any medical evidence for social workers. We were feeling frustrated; after all, a society, institution or person that doesn’t care about kids is a non worthy one. So that morning this “female individual” came saying that the girl fell down and had pain in the shoulder and hand. The dislocation was evident and consistent with those caused by pulling the arm of little kids, we did a complete revision and we found other bruises and oldest lesions not according to her story. Boom! WE GOT HER! Finally we could help this little baby girl of 2 years old, saving her from staying locked under chains in the house without supervision, or from not eating, or from being beaten and who knows what worst things. Her beautiful hazel eyes were looking for help and relief and we were now able to give her that.

My nurse by then was a very religious and moderated person. Me (not precisely a calm human been, I recognize), putting a bandage to the child’s arm, between the anger and the lack of experience of a recently graduated doctor, had no other impulse that shouting on the mother and call her many ugly names while we were waiting for the social worker and authorities that our assistant did call in secret, to arrive. She was just in that attitude of ignoring me pretending to clean her nail polish. I almost lost control but that nurse put a hand on my shoulder, smiling nicely and saying “calm down, she doesn’t worth it, you can’t expect better, she is just another shrimp”.

A what?!”. “Yes Doc, you know in those animals the main organs of the digestive system are inside the head, so in those persons like shrimps their attitude and all coming from their mouths is same like the final results of digestion ”.

All my anger instantly disappear in an stertorous laughing. I knew that not in a million years she will pronounce the sh** word! Dears I agree, it’s kinda mean calling a person like that, but you must recognize is also very illustrative and accurate because, with no brain but some digestive tract structures in the head, that person will have instead of grey matter pure stools, so they will act consequently to that; not saying that this will be only thing coming out from their mouth.

Hilarious and witty! Her comment changed my mood for good immediately. And I felt that this was a better way to deal with our problems at work; smart answers will put you in a better position in front of rivals and a good humour will protect your heart, and your head will be more able to find the best solutions, because we have many ugly things to deal with in our profession, allow them to deeply affect you is not a wise choice.

It was a ”gaining experience” event and gladly all went good as the little girl did grow with an aunt and cousins surrounded of real affection even when sadly “the shrimp” never wanted to have nothing to do with her anymore. And us, well, since then we had that code for not desirable people. “H* the shrimp.. A * the shrimp… That family of shrimps…” Even now when I visit my home country and go to say hi to that dear nurse we still do that and people has no clue!

But now you guys know…

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